*FAITH, Books, Creative Writing?

I would have what I want, but I wouldn’t know “Him”

waiting = knowing more of Him


Desperately, helplessly, longingly, I cried:
Quietly, patiently, lovingly God replied.
I pled and I wept for a clue to my fate,
And the Master so gently said,
“Child, you must wait.”
“Wait? You say, wait!” my indignant reply.
“Lord, I need answers, I need to know why!
Is Your hand shortened? Or have You not heard?
By faith, I have asked, and am claiming Your Word.

“My future and all to which I can relate
Hangs in the balance, and You tell me to WAIT?
I’m needing a ‘Yes,’ a go-ahead sign,
Or even a ‘No’ to which I can resign.

“And Lord, You promised that if we believe
We need but to ask, and we shall receive.
And, Lord, I’ve been asking, and this is my cry:
‘I’m weary of asking! I need a reply!'”

Then quietly, softly, I learned of my fate
As my Master replied once again, “You must wait.”
So, I slumped in my chair, defeated and taut
And grumbled to God, “So, I’m waiting… for what?”

He seemed, then, to kneel
And His eyes wept with mine,
And He tenderly said, “I could give you a sign,
I could shake the heavens, and darken the sun,
I could raise the dead, and cause mountains to run.

“All you seek, I could give, and pleased you would be,

You would have what you want —
But, you wouldn’t know Me.

You’d not know the depth of My love for each saint;
You’d not know the power I give to the faint;

“You’d not learn to see through the clouds of despair;
You’d not learn to trust just by knowing I’m there;
You’d not know the joy of resting in Me;
When darkness and silence were all you could see.

“You’d never experience that fullness of love
As the peace of My Spirit descends like a dove;
You’d know that I give and save, for a start,
But you’d not know the depth of the beat of my heart.

“The glow of My comfort late into the night,
The faith that I give when you walk without sight,
The depth that’s beyond getting just what you asked
Of an infinite God, who makes what you have last.

“You’d never know, should your pain quickly flee,
What it means that, ‘My grace is sufficient for thee,’
Yes, your dreams for your loved one overnight would come true,

But, oh, the loss if I lost what I’m doing in you!

“So, be silent, My child, and in time you will see
That the greatest of gifts is to get to know Me,
And though oft’ may My answers seem terribly late,
My most precious answer of all is still, “Wait.'”

(This poem originally appeared in
Wait: A journey to discovering the heart of God by Russell Kelfer,
and was excerpted from
Emotional Purity: An Affair of the Heart by Heather Arnel Paulsen)

Thanks to my friend, Tin, for sharing this excerpt (which eventually made me read the actual book! haha). Anyway, I believe you’ll agree with me when I say that the poem was so beautifully written, it’s unfair not to share it!

So yes, if you’re waiting for an “answer” from God, whatever that may be, I hope this poem somehow “answered” you for now. After all, nothing worth it ever comes easy in this life, so if you’re being “pruned” right now, just remember that you’re in good hands — God’s hands!

In the meantime, while you’re still waiting, take advantage and get to know more of Him. Talk to Him. PRAY! What is He trying to teach or tell you? And then LISTEN — through your heart.

I wish you well, my friend. Stay patient and strong, and God bless!!! ❤

“The Lord is not slow in keeping His promise, as some understand slowness. Instead He is patient with you, not wanting anyone to perish, but everyone to come to repentance.”
-2 Peter 3:9

Creative Writing?, Gathered Thoughts

That Kind of Love

Signs that Mika Chiong is in love: she keeps staring at that person’s name and number on her cell phone; she then starts writing a novella based on her current situation; she doesn’t mind whether or not he’s British (haha!), all that matters is he is who he is!  And worst, she starts rhyming.

“Not Necessarily Love”
by Mika Chiong

I never thought I’d meet a guy like you,
Someone so friendly and hated by few.
In fact, rephrase that;
You’re not hated ’cause you’re nearly perfect,
And your presence makes other people elated!

I’ve always liked you, like most girls do;
But it’s highly unlikely that I’ll ever be your boo.
Oh yes, we’re friends, if you can even consider that;
Things just get complicated when I start to get sad.

Sad in the sense that here I go again;
I don’t think I can survive another case of unrequited love.
I once fell in love, and all I felt was pain;
This has to stop for it’s starting to make me laugh!

My thoughts are kind of hazy but
When I think of the words “I love you,”
I start to act like crazy!
How can I be sure that I already “love” you,
When I haven’t even heard you say that “four-letter” word
Even to a few?

On the other hand, this ain’t just a crush;
And before I fall hard and feel like
Some sort of trash,
I want to say thanks for making me feel
This kind of “love” rush.

All this time I just
Needed a little inspiration;
Not necessarily love, but enough to
Make me write this whole presentation!

This is bad.  Really, really bad.  Not to mention, downright PATHETIC.  Yes, I’m calling myself pathetic.  Just this once.  But I’m pathetic, nonetheless.

Now you know I really got it bad!  Hahaha!

So when exactly did I realize that my “love” for him was finally being preceded by the preposition “in”?  That moment I saw THAT picture.

More importantly, to whom am I “in love” with?  Asa kayo!  Syempre hindi ko sasabihin noh!  FOR NOW. 😛

And last question, why am I blogging about it?  Well, it’s like what I said before.  Sometimes, I just can’t keep my thoughts to myself.  And blogging serves as my outlet when that happens.  It makes me more connected to and reflect more on my feelings, you know?  So here I am.

Here I am attempting to feel more connected to and reflect more on “the love” I’m feeling right now.  And there’s no better way to do that than talk about it.

But you know, I once talked about love.  Not that I’m an expert on it, but I did talk about it.  Once.

Just saying.

So what exactly did I say?  Well, I said that love indeed comes from all sorts of things and from different people from all walks of life.  It may be love in the form of friendship which is a feeling that puts me on high, and it can also be love for family which in my opinion, is one of the greatest gifts God ever trusted upon me.  Speaking of God, there’s also a form of love which I dedicate solely to Him.  If you love Him, then there’s no need to further explain.  You should already know how it feels because I know I DO.  And last, but definitely not the least, is love in the form of a relationship with the opposite sex (or the same sex for others).  For me, this is the most complicated form of L-O-V-E.

Don’t get me wrong, that’s just my opinion.  Why complicated?  Because if it’s love NOT returned, it’s like a venom ready to kill you slowly.  You may not feel the hurt from time to time but when it reaches your heart at some point, you’ll be dead right then and there!  There was a time when I felt like giving up already.  “Was” being the operative word.  What I did was to just try to look on the bright side.  If I fight the venom, then I’ll still be able to live my life and start a new one.  That’s when the other forms of love enter.  They’re like the anti-venom for all of my miseries.  If one didn’t work out the way I hoped it would, all I have to do is tilt my head back on the other side.

It’s also like playing tennis.  It’s either you hit the ball with a forehand or a backhand, either way, if your ball’s OUT, at least you know you have both of your hands to do it all over again and score a point.  But then again, for tennis players, LOVE MEANS NOTHING (at least during a rally).  I researched the term and I found out that it was derived from the French word l’oeuf, the egg, symbolizing nothing.

Then it made me wonder…  is love really nothing if it goes only one-way?  I once said it’s not.  It’s not nothing!  As Andy Roddick put it after losing a match to Roger Federer, “It was frustrating, it was miserable, it sucked.  But besides that, it was fine.”  And just like how my previous unrequited love felt, yeah it sucked, but in the end, it was all worth the pain!

Now, the question is: is the current one still worth the pain?  I’d like to think so.  Besides, aren’t there sayings that say (how redundant) “no pain, no gain” and “all’s fair in love and war”?  Ha!  Now it’s really confirmed that I got it “worse” since I’m already quoting random shizz.  Wahahahaha!

Oh well papel.  If all else fails, this experience can always make me “stronger.”  Why not?

And I’ll always have Snape to take inspiration from!  (If you didn’t get what I just said, you obviously didn’t read or watch the last installment of Harry Potter!  So READ and WATCH IT!!!)

The “saint” of all unrequited love-rs! =))

Ay nako, tama na nga ang rambling.

Sa totoo lang, ito lang naman yun eh.  Or in English, it all comes down to this:

“Without the fear of how it might end…  I guess I’m ready to love again.”

Tamaaa!  Unrequited or not, choosy or easy, I’m ready to love again.  So universe, bring it on!  Let the love begiiin.  Paaak!

With love, love, luuurve,
Mika 😛